Open ‘letter’ to KPMG
Dear KPMG,
Fuck you very much.
Fuck you for telling me that I was made redundant three days after I actually was.
Fuck you for taking two weeks find the paperwork that you’d had for four weeks in storage.
Fuck you very much for not telling me that the company’s insolvency was held up for four weeks because you hadn’t sorted anything out with the courts.
And an especially big fuck you for lying to me and telling me you’d received my claim, and then not telling me that you actually hadn’t until I had to ‘phone-chase you across half of Scotland another four weeks later.
Oh, and fuck you also for not getting in touch with me at any stage to let me know things had gone even further tits up.
Let’s face it: you couldn’t audit yourself out of a wet and defective tissue-paper bag, could you?
Vitriolically yours,
Disappointed of Edinburgh.